I just finished Mass Effect 2. Anyone who knows me will recognize this as a victory in and of itself - I do as well. I'm having trouble feeling good about it though.
To say that I didn't like Mass Effect 2 would be an incredible lie - it was awesome. The combat was tight, the conversations and dialogue was honest, and I got my moneys worth for sure with an easy 30 hours. But something isn't sitting right with me right now. I've hypothesized that this is due to this being the "middle child" of the series, much in the same way Empire Strikes Back is the middle child, and because the story line has no definite conclusion, maybe I'm feeling a bit empty. I've also theorized that maybe I rushed it at the end, and didn't take my time to appreciate the world like I did in the earlier parts of the game. I'm really not certain at all.
I don't like the decisions I made, but it seems like I'm in too deep now. This even goes back to the first Mass Effect game. I, being the curious gamer I am, couldn't pass up the opportunity with a romance situation and it's corresponding achievement points. As a result, I ended up creating this weird awkward relationship thing that keeps haunting me. I instantly regretted the decision, wishing I would have forgone the side quest for the sake of being true to the personal choice I was putting into my protagonist, but it won't leave me alone. Even on my desk in my room on the ship, there's a picture of Ashley. Determined not to make the same mistake again, I skipped the relationship missions on this game as well, only to have my main character walk around all lonely in his room before the final suicide run, and gaze awkwardly at his picture of Ashley! I tried so hard to invest my own choices and decisions into my character in hopes of creating a more personal gaming experience for myself, only to find that I'm being alienated by my own choices. I've even been tempted to start the whole experience over, crank through ME 1 and 2 again just so I can remake some of my choices.
This is so frustrating right now. I'm so glad I played both of these games, but the time I was spending playing it was significantly more rewarding than the consequences of my choices. Because the results were different from what I expected, I have less desire to embrace these choices as my own, but if I hold to my process of creating an honest, personal gameplay experience then I need to just accept this and move on. I don't even feel right creating a new character and starting over, even if it were just to make all the renegade choices... I'm taking away from the impact these games should have on me, or something.
I guess at the end of the day (which it is long past for me) I'm just a little bummed because I was hoping for a little more closure, and I didn't get. I wouldn't have gotten it anyway, since Mass Effect 3 doesn't exist yet, but not being happy and comfortable with the decisions I made can't be helping.
Who really likes Empire over Jedi anyway?
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Return of the Jedi is my favorite, I think, of the Star Wars trilogy. But Empire did reveal that Vader was Luke's father! What a shocking twist to a movie!
ReplyDeleteAnyways, I would say just remember it's a game with characters confined to your harddrive and imagination and nothing else. I've encountered these similiar problems in games, where I might make a choice, whether on purpose or accident, that the character I'm attempting to play would not make. I also felt a twing of guilt if I accidentally killed a peasant in Assassin's Creed or ran over some random old lady in GTA. As criminal as Nico is, I still tried to follow some semblance of reality in that game where I would, obviously, run through red lights, but attempt to pay tolls and not run over random people... call me weird but I usually play the good guy and will only attempt the evil character on a 2nd playthrough.
On the other side, it's hard to resist stealing in games that encourage it and reward it, such as Oblivion (where I would consider myself a Robin Hood...) or Fallout 3. So other than the occasional bout of cleptomania, I enjoy playing the good guys but to go back and overthink my choices detracts from the overall enjoyment.
After all, they are just games...
I just think it's hilarious that you were in love with Yeomen Kelly and she got killed! BOOM! When you told me you liked her and were had dinner with her in your cabin I was giddy because she gonna die!
ReplyDeleteI guess I'm having a hard time understanding what you're upset about as far as the relationships go. Are you bummed that you didn't pursue anything or that you did and it meant nothing? Did you bone Ashley in ME1 and since you didn't do anything to anyone in ME2 you just longed for her in the game?
I went Miranda all the way!
Also, did you talk to Legion a lot? I was blown away in the subtlety of his answers when you questioned him about the armor he wears that use to be yours.
3N3MY, yeah, when Kelly died... I was a little crushed. Concerning the game relationships... I was just trying to play the story with my own decisions in mind. In ME1, I violated that by hooking up with Ashley - I didn't really want to, but I wanted the achievement. In ME2, I ignored those temptations, and my relationship with Ashley came back. It also was frustrating to find out in retrospect that I could have forgone a relationship in ME1 and have one with Tali, the true character I was attracted to in 1, in ME2. I kinda want to play it all again.
ReplyDeleteJunpier, I'm gonna have to disagree here. If we treat games as only games, and rest in that thought at the end of the day, the only thing pushing forward the player character interaction in our own desires/ our own twisted fantasies to see something play out that isn't there. It's too easy to accept that these things aren't real, but when it involved conditions of the heart, and you care about anything that happens in the game at all, it's "real" (enough).
It's like waking from a realistic dream. Something very good, or very bad could happen in that dream, and to your mind, it's completely real. Depending on the nature of the dream, you might be grateful or disappointed that the dream was just that, but it effects your mind... you might dwell on it throughout the day, it might bring up old feelings for someone, or cause you to feel fear unnecessarily sometime. I'm hardly saying that we should treat dreams as fact, but in terms of how we understand and comprehend the world around us, dreams are as real as memories.
And so is the media we participate in, especially when the media is designed to prompt feelings within us. Mass Effect is designed to promote an emotional commitment to these characters, but unless we suspend our understanding that "this is only a game", we'll be robbing ourselves of the emotional reward therein.
"Faith is a fact."
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